Taming the Tongue in a Twitter World

Many believe we live in a time of increased incivility both in society and in the church. A plethora of evidence lies only a tweet, Facebook post, or op-ed news cast away.

I am inclined to believe that human beings are neither more nor less capable of incivility now than we ever were. Rather, more of us inhabit the blue ball than ever before and giving “voice” to our thoughts and venting our passions on a wide scale is easier than at any other time in history. Today’s communication resources, including the internet and social media, give nearly anyone who wants it a front row seat to the current-day controversy. Clashes of policy and personality are magnified. Facts and  thoughtful discussion can be obscured in 140 character tweets, sensational headlines, and knee-jerk Facebook interactions — all of which tend to inflame at least as much as they enlighten.

According to James, the apostle of Jesus, and ancient sage, the magnified incivility of our time has spiritual roots which require spiritual insights applied in practical ways. He writes,

2 For all of us make many mistakes. Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check … 5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great exploits. How great a forest is set ablaze by a small fire!  6 And the tongue is a fire. The tongue is placed among our members as a world of iniquity; it stains the whole body, sets on fire the cycle of nature, and is itself set on fire by hell. (James 3:2, 5-6)   

James understands how prone human beings are to making mistakes. This propensity to error is never more evident than in our speaking (verbal or written media).  James writes of “mistakes,” but he is making a diagnosis which suggests far more than a casual “boo-boo.” He has in mind not  simply bad grammar or failing to say what we mean very well. He knows how easily our communication reveal our sin nature and our deep spiritual need (cf. Romans 3:13, 14; Matthew 12 :34, Mark 7:21-23).

Our words can build up or tear apart. The tiny body part called the tongue boasts and in doing so reveals our sinful pride and self-sufficiency. Like a small spark of fire can burn down a forest, our words can set fire to relationships with family, friends and in the community and world. What we say can to produce understanding and harmony, or anger, jealousy, hatred, war and strife. The tongue is a fire. It is the conduit for a “world of iniquity.” The stain of our words can overshadow and negate other more positive qualities of our lives.  Our tongue can sometimes become the instrument of Satan and every hellish impulse in ourselves and others. May of the angry, snide, snarky, uncivil words floating on the communication wave today generally tear others down and give rise to the same kind of words in return.

James also understands the connection between being able to master our tongue and the ability to grow holy habits and behaviors in other areas of our lives. “Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check …”

John Wesley taught early Methodists to go on to perfection — allow the Holy Spirit to shape motives, priorities, inner desires and outward communications actions in the likeness of Jesus Christ. James gives us the additional insight that as we grow in mastery over what we say and how we say it we take large strides toward the perfection of love that God longs to find in us.

A note in the Wesley Study Bible explains that speech is so important because it displays our attitudes and commitments. If what is coming from our mouths (and our tweets and public discourse) damages rather than building up we have reason to turn once again to the One who is able to deliver us from every form of brokenness and sin.

Nothing here suggests that we must refrain from frank and even pointed debate, dialogue and discussion.  We need not abandon Twitter or Facebook. At their best respectful debate and thoughtful discussion and dialogue are opportunities to seek truth and understanding in our private lives and in the public square. We can and should seek to have our words seasoned with salt (Col. 4:6).

Here are some things we can all do to season our communications with the salt of Christ, as well as grace, truth and civility.

  • Honor the innate dignity of others whether we agree or disagree. All people are created in the image of God and are loved by God. Those who disagree with us on important matters are often lovers of God.
  • Engage issues rather than demeaning those who hold differing convictions. We can see the actions of others and can evaluate their words. We cannot see their hearts or fully know their motives.
  • Check the factuality of the communication to which we are making response. Is the source reliable, confirmed by others? Search for supported facts rather than blindly responding to “alternate truth” that bolsters our view of things.
  • Focus more on bringing light than heat. Avoid sensation leads and headlines simply to grab attention and fire others up. Learn to notice inflammatory words that will delight your allies but inflame others — and take a tone that will make your point while leaving communication open.
  • Avoid stifling discussion by expressing offense at what others say or labeling them in ways that marginalize them. Labeling others as heretics, haters, bigots, conservative or progressive extremists generally discounts others without engaging their viewpoints.
  • Be patient and graceful in responding to uncivility. All of us are only going on to perfection!

Hopefully, on the journey we can add salt and light!

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